It is just over a week that I stayed myself separately and it feels light and different! I have been staying with a cousin brother ever since I graduated. I have also been searching for suitable rent for some time and finally I have got and it does feel great to have one’s own apartment to live in. If we are not from the capital and we have no close relatives and siblings especially in Thimphu, it is very hard to survive you know. I hail from the very remote jungle and I don’t have any real siblings here in Thimphu or any other urban areas but luckily I have my first cousins who have helped me since twelve standards and I owe them a lot.
But still it is not always easy. As a student or a job seeker, having to live with relatives during vacation or after the completion of your studies is hard. There are instances where we have to often pretend and even lie out of guilt. We have no option but to live in fear at the cost of compromises and adjustments. Anyone can be a guest only for the first day and the next day we are but pest! We begin to encounter fake smiles at the faces of host as the duration of our stay increases. A friend of mine who was recently employed with me has lot to say about this kind of situations, about the guilt and uneasiness one feels at other’s home. The most interesting thing was about the meals. “Omara charo faii ga zawa” (Just ate in friend’s house) used to be his common sentence most of the time whenever he was offered with meals and had to remain empty stomach. I am sure most who traced the same path would agree with him on this which I am one of them.
Having a rent, a house yourself means that you have more freedom, freedom of choice, freedom to your mind and body. There is no guilt or pretense. You can have meals whenever and whatever you like. You can go to bed or wake up as you wish with alarm clocks off in off days. You have all the freedom to decide yourself; whether to come home early or late night or hang out with your closed buddies. There is no tether that pulls in whenever you are at the rim of certain circumference.
Of course it isn’t an easy task to set up alone at the beginning.