It is just over
a week that I stayed myself separately and it feels light and different! I have
been staying with a cousin brother ever since I graduated. I have also been
searching for suitable rent for some time and finally I have got and it does
feel great to have one’s own apartment to live in. If we are not from the
capital and we have no close relatives and siblings especially in Thimphu, it is very hard to survive
you know. I hail from the very remote jungle and I don’t have any real siblings
here in Thimphu or any other urban areas but luckily I have my first cousins
who have helped me since twelve standards and I owe them a lot.
But still it is
not always easy. As a student or a job seeker, having to live with relatives during
vacation or after the completion of your studies is hard. There are instances
where we have to often pretend and even lie out of guilt. We have no option but
to live in fear at the cost of compromises and adjustments. Anyone can be a guest
only for the first day and the next day we are but pest! We begin to encounter fake
smiles at the faces of host as the duration of our stay increases. A friend of
mine who was recently employed with me has lot to say about this kind of
situations, about the guilt and uneasiness one feels at other’s home. The most
interesting thing was about the meals. “Omara charo faii ga zawa” (Just ate in
friend’s house) used to be his common sentence most of the time whenever he was
offered with meals and had to remain empty stomach. I am sure most who traced
the same path would agree with him on this which I am one of them.
Having a rent, a
house yourself means that you have more freedom, freedom of choice, freedom to
your mind and body. There is no guilt or pretense. You can have meals whenever and
whatever you like. You can go to bed or wake up as you wish with alarm clocks
off in off days. You have all the freedom to decide yourself; whether to come
home early or late night or hang out with your closed buddies. There is no
tether that pulls in whenever you are at the rim of certain circumference.
Of course it isn’t an easy task to set up
alone at the beginning.
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